Parenting is an extraordinary journey filled with unique challenges and joys. Among the most daunting challenges is maintaining your routine while establishing one for your children. This balancing act is crucial, not just for the well-being of your family but for your health and sanity. This article will explore strategies for juggling these dual responsibilities effectively.
Understanding the Challenge
The birth of a child dramatically alters a parent's life. Suddenly, you are responsible for another human being's complete well-being, which can overshadow your personal needs. Philippa Perry, in "The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read", highlights the importance of maintaining your identity and routines amidst the chaos of parenting. The challenge lies in finding a middle ground where your and your child’s needs are met.
Establishing a Routine for Your Children
The first step in this balancing act is establishing a routine for your children. Anita Cleare’s "The Work Parent Switch" suggests children thrive on predictability and structure. A consistent routine helps them feel secure and aids in their development.
Start by setting regular times for meals, naps, and bedtime. This helps your child and gives you predictable time slots to focus on your tasks. Remember, the routine should be flexible enough to accommodate the unpredictable nature of parenting.
Maintaining Your Routine
While it's vital to establish a routine for your children, it's equally important to maintain your own. This includes time for exercise, hobbies, work, and social activities. In "The Art of Resilience", Ross Edgley emphasises the importance of personal resilience and how maintaining your routine can contribute to it.
- Prioritise and Plan: Identify the non-negotiable aspects of your routine and find slots for them within your child’s routine. For instance, if exercise is crucial for you, consider working out during your child’s naptime.
- Be Realistic: Understand that your routine might be more flexible than pre-parenthood. Be prepared for interruptions and adjustments.
- Involve Your Children: Whenever possible, involve your children in your routine. If you enjoy exercise, make it a family affair with a walk or a play session in the park.
Shared Activities for Routine Building
Shared activities can be an excellent way to meld your routine with your children’s. Daniel Lieberman, in "Exercised" and "The Story of the Human Body", talks about the natural inclination of humans towards physical activities and how this can be a bonding and learning experience for children.
- Physical Activities: Engage in enjoyable physical activities for both you and your child. This could be anything from a game of catch to a yoga session.
- Reading Time: Establish a reading routine where you can also catch up on your reading while your child reads or listens to a story.
- Meal Preparation: Involve your children in meal preparation. This develops their skills and allows them to stick to their cooking routine.
The Importance of Partner Support
If you have a partner, working as a team is essential. Communicate openly about your needs and how you can support each other in maintaining personal routines. Share responsibilities and create opportunities for each other to have personal time.
Seeking External Support
Feel free to seek external support when needed. It could be in the form of childcare, joining a parents' group, or reaching out to friends and family. In "Do Hard Things", Steve Magness highlights the importance of community and support systems in managing challenges.
Flexibility and Adaptation
Flexibility is key. Parenthood is unpredictable, and routines will need to be adjusted over time. As Alexis Dubief suggests in "Precious Little Sleep", adaptability is crucial in parenting. What works one week may not work the next, and that’s okay.
Self-care is Not Selfish
It’s important to remember that taking care of yourself is not selfish. It's necessary. A well-rested, healthy parent can provide the best care for their children. So, while developing a routine for your child, don’t forget to include self-care in yours.
In Conclusion
Balancing your routine with your children is not about perfection but finding what works best for your family. It requires patience, flexibility, and a bit of creativity. Remember, by maintaining your routine and establishing one for your children, you’re meeting your personal needs and modelling essential life skills like time management and self-care to your children. The goal is to create a harmonious environment where you and your children can thrive.